A REFLECTIVE INVESTMENT IN FUTURE YOU

Could boundaries help our sense of overwhelm in this pivotal moment?

Will you join me to test a theory I have?

It comes from the thought that all the feelings we’re feeling are natural outcomes of:

  • doing your ‘job’

  • whilst looking after yourself and others,

  • whilst holding the grief and fear and overwhelm of the health/climate/social justice crises we’re in,

  • whilst taking action that helps you be part of the solution,

  • whilst having joy and love and softness and rest, plus plus plus…

When our household is handling a crisis or emergency, we have a thing of going ‘segment by segment’.

The size of the segment varies.

Sometimes it’s day by day. Sometimes it’s meal break to meal break. Sometimes it’s literally 20 minute chunks.

When you’re going segment by segment, you just look at what needs to happen in the this segment and shut out the rest.

It helps to shut out the overwhelm and anxiety to focus just on the essentials.

I wonder if the same approach might work in terms of creating a ‘segment’ for the next three months. (If three months is too long - feel free to substitute a different length segment.)

I have a feeling it might actually be quite useful?

We can’t pay attention to everything.

I notice that I when I go onto social media and read reports of the worsening of many many aspects of our world(s), all I feel is urgency but that urgency can feel unfocused and overwhelming.

I also know that, in my day job, I’m partially working on a tiny part of making things better for some people, but I also want to do more. But what more?

And I know that there are ways I want to be, ways I want to look after myself, (so many) things I want to learn - both skills but also knowledge, particularly around aspects of the climate/social justice/human rights crisis maelstrom - and actions I could take.

I’m not quite in a place where I know what my five/ten/twenty year plan is for where I belong in the movement.

(That’s why I’m holding the space for a leadership peer learning journey later on in the year.)

Things are shifting in such a rapid way, that making a decision to clear a piece of ground and plant (metaphorical) trees seems a bit of a big step.

But… three months? I think we can plan for three months.

Here’s some questions to help you think/feel this through.

  1. What can I do to make my soil richer and more fertile?

When you look at your inner garden, so to speak, what’s the soil like? Is it soft, dark, and lush? Or tough and cracked?

What’s it like if you dig down a little bit?

What’s one (or maybe two) actions you could take to make it more fertile?

This might be ways you can care for yourself - either on your own or with others.

Are there things that you know recharge you?

  • Walking in nature?

  • Spending time with animals?

  • Getting a break from your phone?

  • Reading?

  • Sleeping more?

  • Getting up earlier?

  • Eating certain foods in a certain way?

  • Talking with loved ones?

  • Making something with your hands?

Choose one (or two) that you’d like to gently focus on for the next three months.

2. What’s already thriving that I want to nurture?

Are there aspects of your garden that are already strong and steady? Things that you’ve built into your life that you want to keep?

Or maybe they’re new but you want to protect them, nurture them so they grow deeper roots?

Choose one (or maybe two) things that you’d like to gently look after in the next three months.

3. What do I want to cut back, to let some sun in?

Okay, when I asked this question of a group a couple of weeks ago, suddenly the chat was full of people saying it was a hard question!

When you look at your garden, what one (or maybe two!) things might you want to cut back on so that other parts of the garden get more sun - and nutrients?

Any gardener knows that ‘weeds’ are only plants in the wrong place - so what’s growing in your garden that you’d prefer wasn’t? It might be something you never wanted there, or it’s just in the wrong place/time.

You’ll likely find more than one or two ‘weeds’ but we’re all about reducing overwhelm, so which one (or two) do you want to cut back on in the next three months.

4. What one or two seeds do I want to plant?

Finally, we look at what what you might want to plant.

What would you like, in three months, to be growing in your garden?

What one (or maybe two) things do you want to begin? What do want to start learning? What do you want to start supporting more?

One seed. Maybe two.

Final question: How does this all feel in your body?

Looking at your list of four-to-maximum-eight things you’ve just identified - how does it all feel in your body?

If you were to devote, say, 85% of your (discretionary) attention and energy just to these few things, how does your body respond? If you were to consciously try and park pretty much everything else?

Does it feel peaceful? Does it feel overwhelming? How does it affect your breathing?

Is it leaving you feeling closer to how you’d like to feel?

Adjust accordingly.

NB. I made a chart of mine just to remember. Well, I say a ‘chart’ - it was a little doodle on an envelope. But it helps.

Let me know how you get on?

If a clear focus over a period of time feels like a helpful thing, check out the six-month Leadership Evolution learning marathon I’m holding the space for.

Applications close on 16th August 2021.